The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
