trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
