Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
