let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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