i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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