Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Randomize
