1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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