: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
