ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
