that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
