Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
