i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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