you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
