problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Randomize
