i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
