What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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