New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
