i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
