Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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