Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
