smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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