Fuck appropriateness.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
