Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
We're too hungover to prance.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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