My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
