Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Randomize
