4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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