he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
