I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
