I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
