So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
