he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
