I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Did I show you my penis last night?
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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