We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize