talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
