my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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