hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
