And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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