1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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