Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
