I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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