i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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