so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
