Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Randomize
