dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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