For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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