Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
