I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
