I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
COCAINE IS GR8
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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