Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
