seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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