Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Randomize
